He Said....
The Nepalese word for mattress must be "wood" as that was pretty much what we slept on last night, needless to say I'm not in the best of humour, my breakfast- the British classic 'Beans on Toast' (also a local delicacy it seems) arrive after 45 minutes...as a sandwich...
We were 15 minutes late leaving for the border, which didn't matter as when we crossed into India we went back a whole 15 minutes, go figure.
The border crossing was just as it is depicted in the movies- pure mayhem, an utter fluster cluck, we walked across with our bags as we said goodbye to Nepal and hello to India, and a new bus with fans and working A/C....so things are looking up, right???
Country number 2-India has 1.2 billion inhabitants, 1 billion cars and trucks, 800 million scooters and bicycles, 125 million Tut Tuts (auto-Rickshaws to you and me) and just 17 roads.
Tut Tuts....imagine a Robin Reliant with no doors, for Grenadians imagine the bagel van. Now sardine 12 of your closest friends and family inside with one or two strangers for good measure and drive really slowly along the M25(GND-Maurice Bishop) at rush hour, and that's how they do!
When you have graduated from driving a Nepalese Tata truck you receive a diploma in Crazy Asshole and are sent to drive tourist buses in India, as that is exactly how they all drive.
Their buses are on their own personal set of rails and everybody and anybody else is in the way, in fact the only things they slow down for is...
Pot holes....Nope!
Speed bumps (they come in 5's)....Nah!
Women......No Sir!
Nuns....Not a chance!
Monks......Thats a negative!
They slow down and even stop................
for goats and cows...
and that's it, everyone else they drive towards, at speed, and at the very last minute swerve to avoid disaster, hence the title. I have never blasphemed so much in a day, it was like an endless universal studios ride, and I'm pretty sure I heard a few "Lord Buddhas!!" as our tourist juggernaut ploughed it's unstoppable path through rural North East India.
I know every single pothole and speed bump from Nepal to Varanasi, the reason why good folk shouldn't take 13 hour bus journeys is because we invented planes, 13 hours....360 kilometres. I don't think it's ever taken me thirteen hours to get anywhere, ever!
What are my first impressions of "Incredible India"?? Best not to ask today, ay.
As for Nepal...
The highlight-Mount Everest and the laid-back scene and breath taking scenery of Pokhara.
The low point- The trash and it's lack of management, as it is such a beautiful country. Wish I had...packed a dust mask for Kathmandu, it's smogerrific.
Wish I hadn't ...packed so many warm clothes, cos' it ain't that cold.
Film for today's journey was Phenomenon, song of the day was Bed of Roses by Bon Jovi, as sung in a shrill Indian voice by our Gap Adventures (thats a plug) group leader- Abbisheik
Tomorrow is a 4.30 wake up to catch sunrise over the River Ganges....Am I going? I'll let you figure that one out. G'night.
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